Cutting Pinocchio's Strings: Intentionally Creating Your Identity

What’s your avatar? The mask you hide behind- the social image you project. Who are you becoming, and what are you showing to the world? It’s not about finding yourself like you’re some lost treasure buried in the sand. It’s about creating yourself, piece by piece. You can peel back the layers of who you’ve been and put on the truth by how you choose to be! 

People can discover their true selves by doing three things: 

• Get radically honest about what’s not working 
  Most people wake up one day and realize they’re living someone else’s life. Maybe it’s their parents’ expectations, their culture’s norms, or even the roles they’ve fallen into over time. And that’s when the discomfort kicks in. That’s when they start asking, “Why am I doing this? Is this even me?” That honesty—though uncomfortable—is the first step. You’ve got to face the truth of where you’re conforming or playing small. 

Journal Prompt: What parts of my life feel like a performance? Where am I out of alignment with who I truly am? 

• Reconnect with your values and desires 
  Your true self isn’t some abstract concept—it’s tied to what you value most and what lights you up. But here’s the problem: most people don’t take the time to define those things. They’re too busy chasing what society says they should want. So, you must pause. Reflect. What do you really care about? What kind of person do you want to be? What kind of life feels meaningful to you? When you reconnect with those core values and desires, you start to see the path to your true self. 

Journal prompt: Write down your top five values. Then ask, Am I living in alignment with these? If not, what needs to change? 

• Take bold, intentional action to live authentically 
  Here’s the truth: uncovering your true self isn’t just about introspection—it’s about action. You’ve got to start showing up as the person you want to be, even if it feels scary or unfamiliar. That might mean setting boundaries, pursuing a dream, or simply being more honest in your relationships. It’s about aligning your daily actions with the person you’re becoming. And yes, it’s messy. Yes, you’ll stumble. But every step you take toward authenticity gets you closer to the person you were created to be. 

Journal Prompt: What’s one small, courageous step I can take today to live more authentically? 

Becoming your true self isn’t a one-and-done thing. It’s a process. It’s a journey. You’ll uncover new mountaintops as you grow, as you heal, as you step into new seasons of life. But that’s the beauty of it, right? You’re not static. You’re changeable. And every step you take toward your true self is a step toward more joy, more freedom, more you. 

 Pinocchio is such a powerful metaphor for this conversation. Think about it- Pinocchio starts as a puppet, right? He’s literally controlled by strings, and his entire existence is dictated by forces outside of himself. But the real heart of his story is his desire to become real, to become his own person. That’s the journey we’re all on, isn’t it? Moving from being reactive—just pulled along by the expectations, opinions, and circumstances around us—to being intentional creators of our own lives. 

✨ The Storyline of Pinocchio ✨ 

The classic story of Pinocchio follows the misadventures of a wooden marionette who desperately wants to become a real boy. The story, originally written as The Adventures of Pinocchio by Italian author Carlo Collodi in 1883, is a morality tale about the importance of honesty, obedience, and hard work. 

The story starts with a lonely old woodcarver named Geppetto who carves a wooden puppet and names him Pinocchio. Geppetto wishes that Pinocchio could become a real boy. 

The Blue Fairy (symbolic of God?) appears and brings Pinocchio to life, though Pinocchio remains a wooden puppet. She tells him he can become a real boy if he proves himself to be "brave, truthful, and unselfish." The Blue Fairy then appoints a talking Cricket (or Jiminy Cricket in the famous Disney film) to be his conscience and guide. We all have this inner voice, or conscience; we don’t always listen to it! 

Journal Prompt: Pinocchio was told what values he needed to embody in order to become real. Now it’s your turn. What values would you be exhibiting if you saw your best self in a difficult situation? 

Pinocchio, like most of us, is easily distracted, lazy, and rebellious. On his way to school (for which Geppetto sells his only coat to buy a school book), he falls in with bad company, like the trickster Fox and Cat. Pinocchio is tempted away from his responsibilities by promises of easy money or fun. 

Pinocchio's disobedience and selfishness leads him into many dangers and predicaments when he runs away from home and school. He is tricked out of money, almost turned into firewood, gets manipulated into playing a puppet in a puppet show, and even tricked into going to a place called Pleasure Island where lazy boys are turned into donkeys. Pinocchio suffers this transformation himself. 

When we let distractions or temptations pull us away from our values, we risk losing who we really are. Pinocchio had to face the consequences of his choices, take responsibility, and fight to become his puppet self instead of the donkey. That’s where the growth happens. It’s not just about avoiding the distractions—it’s about recognizing when we’ve strayed and having the courage to course-correct. 

Journal Prompt: What’s your Pleasure Island? What’s pulling you off track or tempting you to settle for less than your best self? And more importantly, what would it look like to step back into alignment with who you want to be? 

Somehow, Pinocchio learns that Geppetto has been swallowed by a giant whale when he has gone off in search of his puppet son. Pinocchio selflessly sets out to find and save his father by taking the brave, bold move of diving into the sea. He gets swallowed by the creature himself and is reunited with Geppetto inside its belly. Pinocchio figures out how to escape and helps his elderly father get to safety. 

After the rescue, Pinocchio dedicates himself to caring for his now-sick father, working hard, and leading an honest life, finally choosing to listen to the advice he had heard earlier in his life. Because Pinocchio has demonstrated true repentance, courage, and selflessness, the Blue Fairy rewards him by finally transforming him into a real human boy. The story emphasizes that being a "real boy" is not about being flesh and blood, but about developing a good character through moral choices and selfless actions. 

There is Breakthrough in Boldness. Walk in the full freedom of knowing your identity. 

When Pinocchio is a puppet, he’s not making choices. He’s just going through the motions, doing what others want or expect. But when he starts to think outside of himself, that’s when everything changes. He cuts the strings that society and his own greed had tied to him by taking responsibility for his actions, listening to his conscience, and choosing to make choices that aligned with his values. That’s the shift from being a puppet to being your real self. 

Journal Prompt: Where in your life do you feel like you’re being pulled by strings? Is it other people’s expectations? Is it fear of failure? Is it just going through the motions because it’s easier than stepping into the unknown? 

Go deeper: What would it look like to cut those strings and start creating the life you want? What’s one choice you could make this week that feels like stepping into your ‘real’ self?

The beauty of this metaphor is that it reminds us we too can change. Pinocchio didn’t stay a puppet forever. His choices to save Gepetto and take care of the messes he had made allowed him to be transformed into a real boy, as the Blue Fairy promised. But it takes intention, courage, and a willingness to face the truth about where we’re letting people and circumstances control us. That’s where the magic happens—when we decide to pull our own strings and say, “This is who I want to be, and I’m going to create that.” 

And that’s the lesson, right? When we let distractions or temptations pull us away from our values, we risk losing who we really are. Pinocchio had to face the consequences of his choices, take responsibility, and fight to become real again. That’s where the growth happens. It’s not just about avoiding the distractions—it’s about recognizing when we’ve strayed and having the courage to course-correct. There is breakthrough in boldness. Walk in the full freedom of knowing your identity!

In our coaching sessions, we explore more areas to help you walk in your true identity to create the life you can enjoy! Let me know if you want to take that step and activate your best life; sign up for a free strategy call with the link by the posts. You too can change your thinking and change your life!

Book recommendations:   

Batterson, Mark. Play the Man: Becoming the Man God Created You to Be. Baker Books, 2017.

Bowler, Kate. No Cure for Being Human: (and other truths I need to hear). Random House, 2021.