Overcoming Overwhelm: Moving from Paralysis to Proactive Movement

When we think about overcoming overwhelm, we are really talking about movement. It’s the process of shifting from a state of paralysis—that "freeze" mode where you don't know where to turn—into a state of proactive movement.

But to get moving, we first have to understand what we are up against.

I. Defining the Obstacle: What is Overwhelm?

I always like to start with a definition. If you look at the roots of the word, "Over" means above or excessive. "Whelm" comes from Middle English, and it is actually a nautical term meaning to submerge or turn upside down.

To be overwhelmed is to be submerged. It is the feeling of being underwater.

Overwhelm happens when the demands of our lives—the bills, the work projects, the family needs—exceed the resources we think we have. When you don't have enough time, energy, or money to meet those demands, you feel like you’re drowning.

The Physical and Emotional Toll

This isn't just "in your head." It’s in your body. It manifests as a tight chest, a racing mind, or a complete inability to act. I recently spoke with a friend who described nights of crying in bed, literally making herself sick because she didn't know how to move forward.

I’ve been there myself. I once had a vivid dream where I was on a sinking boat. I was frantically trying to push my sister up to the part of the boat that was still above water. Eventually, I fell off and found myself submerged. In the dream, I thought, “Well, I might as well just breathe in the water and be done with it.” Sometimes, that is exactly what overwhelm feels like. You feel so underwater that you just want to stop fighting. But we have to breathe. We have to find a way back to the surface.

II. Identifying the Triggers: The Perfect Storm

Often, overwhelm is a signal that we’ve been "laser-focused" on one area of life—like a big work project or a business startup—for so long that we’ve become oblivious to other parts of our lives slipping. It blinds us to our health, our families, or our friendships.

We often face a "Perfect Storm" of triggers:

• The Financial Stack: Bills piling up and taxes coming due.

• System Failures: The car breaking down right when you need it most.

• The "Start Line" Problem: Not knowing where to begin because everything feels like a high priority.

In my own life, I hit a freeze state when I was trying to manage business startup costs, oil bills, and taxes on a house I wasn't sure I could afford, all while trying to help family members through their own difficult choices. When everything is a "need," nothing gets done.

III. The Framework: A 4-Step Rescue Plan

If you are underwater right now, you don't need a complex theory; you need a rescue plan. Here are four practical steps to regain control.

1. Be Brutally Honest (The Audit)

You cannot fix what you won't look at. You need to do a "brain dump." List every bill, every tax notice, every clutter-filled room, and every mechanical issue. Bringing these things into the light removes their power to haunt you. When they stay in your head, they are monsters; when they are on paper, they are just tasks.

2. Axe the Non-Essentials (Not the Oxygen)

Look at your list and differentiate between needs and wants. To create "breathing room," you have to cut the non-essentials. I love reading, but there was a time when I had to cancel my Audible subscription just to create a little more space in the budget. Axe the luxuries, the social media distractions, and the extras. This isn't deprivation; it’s survival.

3. Ask for Help Fast (The Mirror)

Don't carry the list alone. Take your Audit to a wise friend or a coach and say: "Here is the list. It’s too much for me. Help me pick the one step I need to take first." We are built for community. Asking for help isn't a sign of weakness; it’s a sign that you are strong enough to value wise counsel.

4. Create Cash Flow (What's in Your Hand?)

When God spoke to Moses at the burning bush and Moses was afraid, God asked him: "What is that in your hand?" He had a staff. He already had what he needed to start.

I call myself "Scrappy" because I love looking at what is available. I once had a counselor tell me, "You're scrappy, you'll figure it out." Whether it’s renting out a spare room or using a skill like tiling or organizing, look at what you have. I know a woman who overcame a time of lack by offering to drive kids to practice for parents who were stuck at work. She used her car and her time to create a solution.

IV. The 24-Hour Mission

We freeze when we don't move. Your mission is the 24-Hour Rule: Pick one item from your Audit list—just one—and handle it within the next 24 hours. Don't worry about the whole list. Just take one step. Movement is the cure for paralysis.

Journal Prompts to Help You Focus:

1. An area where I am neglecting someone or something important in my life is . . .

2. An area where that neglect will cause me regret later is . . .

3. An area where I can now return my focus, reallocating my attention to things that matter, is . . .